The Party Scene in the Gayborhood: Signs to Call it Quits or Cut Back on Partying

We’re about to spill the tea on the fabulous but occasionally treacherous territory of the gayborhood party scene. Now, don’t get me wrong—I’m all for glitter, beats, and dancing until dawn, but even the fiercest party animals need a reality check now and then. So, if you find yourself sporting glitter as an accessory 24/7 or your dance moves are starting to look more like interpretive chaos, it might be time to reassess and cut back on the queer shenanigans. After all, fabulousness should come in moderation. Let’s sashay away from the brink of party overdose, shall we?

No matter if you are simply grabbing a bite to eat at Baja Betty’s, having a drink at Mo’s, or dancing at Rich’s, you will likely run into people you know. Out-of-control partying can hurt reputations, put a label on someone’s character, impact the way people see each other, or hurt friendships. Partying is completely fine…as long as it is in moderation. The unhealthy part is when it becomes extreme; out of control, hurting your relationships, and putting yourself at risk.

A few signs you need to cut back on partying in the gayborhood:

The “What Happened Last Night?” Thought (Again): You wake up again the next day after parting with no memory of getting home, difficulty recalling exactly what happened and your stomach sinks hoping that you didn’t do another thing you’d regret. You try to piece together the night, but are lost without any answers. You end up hearing parts of the story through your friends, finding pictures on Facebook and on, and/or reading the random text messages you sent out from the night before.

Behind on Your Responsibilities: Your daily responsibilities are falling to the side and you’re simply not getting things done. Recovery seems to require more time and your body isn’t bouncing back as quickly as it used to. Your work or your personal “to-do lists” are coming to a halt.

Too Many Random Hookups: The sex is fun, yet it is getting out of control. You have more and more nights of random hookups and then feel bad after. You hate the way you feel afterwards, yet you continue to put your body through the ups-and-downs of one night stands. You tell yourself it will be the last time, but then it continues. You are on the emotional rollercoaster wanting to get off the ride, but partying is like a safety seatbelt that keeps you anticipating the next fun part of the ride.

The “How did I get home?” Question: Another morning you wake up with your car parked outside, your keys next to your bed, and confused because you were going to take a taxi home. You don’t remember how you got home, but you put the puzzle pieces together about your night and realize you drove home drunk…again.

Every Activity is Focused On Alcohol: Your social events, daily routines and night life activities involve some sort of alcoholic beverage.

Fractured Relationships: You have a theme of damaging relationships when partying is involved. You continually have to do repair work with your friends, family and relationships. The relationships suffer when the party side of you comes out.

Bad Choices: The worst mistakes happen while you are faded…bad choices put yourself in danger. The endless bad choices could be from too many random hook-ups to more drug use, from getting another STD to having to take another HIV test, or from getting another DUI to another inappropriate comment made to a friend. You continue to face the consequences and you are personally suffering from the bad mistakes.

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