Grief of Divorce: Steps to Cope and Overcome it

loss divorce break ups depression grieving

There is research  that ranks divorce as one of the most stressful life events, second only to loosing a long term spouse or life partner to death. (Dohrenwend et al., 1978; Holmes and Rahe, 1967; Gahler, 2006).

The end of a relationship can feel like the end of life as you knew it. It is common to experience a sense of chaos, a lack of control over your own path. There are different circumstances that will impact how you experience divorce; the length of the marriage, whether there are children from the relationship, the reason for the relationship ending, if you are the one who is making the decision to end it, whether it was unexpected or the divorce is coming after many years of the couple experiencing ongoing struggles in the relationship.However, everyone will experience a grieving process after the end of a long term relationship, even the person who is choosing to leave the marriage.

Read More

Facing Your Loss – Grief Counseling in San Diego

Facing Your Loss grief counseling San diego death grief grieving bereavement moving on five stages

Going through the grieving process

Everyone will experience grief of some sort at some point in life. After all, to love is to experience loss at some point. However, most people don't have a clear understanding of what grief is about. In my work, as I help people during these painful process I often hear questions about what “healthy” grieving should look like, what is normal for them to feel, how long is it ok for someone to continue experiencing symptoms of grief.

Read More

How Do People Develop Eating Disorders?

eating disorders ED body issues health psychology of eating issues

This is a very difficult question to answer and many researchers and scientists are still learning so much about these complicated disorders. BUT we do know it is rarely about the food or wanting to be thin. What? Yes, that’s right, there are many misconceptions about what causes an eating disorder in our society and they really are caused by a combination of factors including genetic, psychological, biochemical, cultural, and environmental.

Read More

Estes Therapy Team’s Favorite Love Songs

date night connection valentine's love songs romance

Get in the mood for date night connection.

It's Valentine's Day! We thought it would be fun to put together a list of some of our favorite love songs - whether they hold special meaning, like first dance songs, or just some catchy tunes that get us excited about love.

Read More

7 Easy Date Night Recipe Ideas

7 Easy Date Night Recipe Ideas

The way to someone's heart is through their stomach

Okay, so there's a lot more to relationships than enjoying good food together, but a dinner date night is classic. Whether it's date 1 or 1,001 cooking together is a great way to connect or re-connect. You get to bond together cooking in the kitchen - or at least set time aside to sit down and enjoy each other's company. So turn your phones off, head to the kitchen, and get cooking.

Read More

Don’t Be Afraid to Fight

Fighting can be healthy conflict right way to fight

There are right ways and wrong ways to fight.

Often people worry that if they are fighting in their relationship that that means they do not belong together. But the truth is that fighting can actually help your relationship become healthier – if you do it right. Arguments, especially in the beginning of your relationship, help to define where the lines are. However, it is important to know what you are fighting about, to be clear about what is upsetting you, and to say what you really mean. Sometimes this is easier said than done.

Read More

Worst Relationship Advice

bad advice relationships tips love personal growth

17 Examples of the Worst Relationship Advice We've Heard

We all like to give and get advice. We read it in magazines and articles online, we hear it on tv and from friends and family. Sometimes, the advice is not good, and can actually be harmful to a relationship or an individual. We put together a list of the 17 worst pieces of relationship advice we've heard, and an explanation to why each piece is not true.

Read More

How to Handle Emotional Eating Over the Holidays

How to Handle Emotional Eating Over the Holidays

If you find yourself feeling stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed as the holidays draw near, you aren’t alone. ‘Tis the season for sugar cookies and stress!

For many people, this stress manifests itself as emotional eating, overeating, or a preoccupation with how we will make healthy choices amidst the sea of peppermint bark and spinach dip. All of these manifestations of stress take us out of the present moment and into our heads. That is not how we want you to remember your holiday season.

Read More

7 Tips for Communicating What You Want from Your Partner in the Bedroom

7 Tips for Communicating What You Want from Your Partner in the Bedroom Estes Therapy Sex Talk Jackie MFT

Communicating about sex can be vulnerable

The truth is, communicating openly about sex can be a vulnerable- and sometimes tough- thing to do. For some, knowing where to start with these conversations can feel confusing and overwhelming. Because sexuality is such an important part of our identities and our relationships, being able to practice sitting in the vulnerability and have these open conversations with your partner is crucial.

Read More

My Child Came Out To Me

what to do when your child is gay lgbt lesbian comes out transgender

Are you unsure how to react to your child coming out to you?

I have had parents ask me this a few times now, so I thought it’s time to share some quick and easy guidelines about how to handle your child’s coming out. What is most important is your relationship with your child. How you react to something that they hold fear or uncertainty around can greatly influence that relationship. You might be nervous about how to handle this for fear of pushing your child away. They have entrusted you with a part of their identity that they may hold anxiety or fear around. They are looking for you to be a safe space, to continue to accept and love them, and to not treat them any differently.

Read More