Ever feel like you’re being bulldozed by your spouse? Have you ever not brought up a conversation for fear of what the outcome may be? Do you ever feel like you are not really being heard, which then causes you to shut down? If the answer to any of these questions are yes, then have no fear. You are not alone. Many married couples deal with these same issues and ask themselves these same questions every day. Some of the easiest and most obvious ways to help is to allow your spouse to express themself, without judgement or interruptions.
Redbook Magazine features Jennine Estes as the “Love Expert.”
Jennine stated, “In order to work through any issue, you have to stay focused on it and not allow yourself to get sidetracked.” This rings true in every aspect of life, but most importantly in your marriage. Staying focused on your life partner and their issues will help eliminate the bickering and allow you both to express yourselves freely, which can in turn produce a resolution. Above you will find the link to the full article published by Redbook Magazine. In this article you will hear about one couple’s issues and how your relationship expert was able to turn their conflict into a resolution and put an end to bickering. Below you will find a few of the quotes of Jennine Estes, MFT.
Our LOVE EXPERT shows this California couple how to stop fighting and find their common ground.
Estes says: “It’s vital that Wally and Cheryl learn to problem-solve as a team, but they can’t do that until they feel comfortable opening up to each other.” Estes suggests that the couple practices by learning to agree on smaller compromises, such as where to have dinner or what movie to see.
Estes says. “Sometimes couples simply can’t see eye to eye — and that’s okay. It doesn’t have to drive a wedge between you.”
And no matter what you’re arguing about, dragging up the past is big no-no, Estes says. “Once you bring up past issues, you bring up all of the resentments, hurts, and misunderstandings that go along with them,” she explains. “In order to work through any issue, you have to stay focused on it and not allow yourself to get sidetracked.”
The first step in addressing heavy topics is to lighten up, Estes says. “Right now, every topic is loaded for Wally and Cheryl because the pressure cooker has been packed full and things are bubbling over,” she says. Estes suggests that the couple “take small bites” out of big issues by committing to a nightly check-in to find out how the other person is feeling.
To read the full article, click the link above.