Posts Categorized: Personal Growth

6 Steps to Prevent Your Partner’s Defensiveness

how to prevent being defensive defensiveness couples fighting arguments

Defensiveness puts up a wall in your relationship. Stop it before it starts.

A defensive person is emotionally closed off, argumentative, and often exhibits negative body language like crossed arms. They will deflect the conversation away from the original issue and either refuse to engage or launch loosely related counterattacks on their partner. This doesn't sound like the kind of person you would feel safe expressing your hurt or concerns with, does it? So how do you stop yourself or your partner from jumping to the defensive?

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What is EMDR Trauma Therapy?

EMDR counseling

What is EMDR and What should I expect?

EMDR stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing. This research-based therapy technique is most beneficial to those seeking treatment for trauma and anxiety. When someone experiences an extreme negative reaction or feeling in response to a certain situation or memory, EMDR is used to help replace the negative emotions with more relaxed reactions. Ultimately, EMDR offers relief and a more positive outlook in facing similar types of stressors.

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Top Apps for Meditation

phone apps meditation

Sometimes we need a little extra help with our meditation.

Sometimes life just keeps adding on to you and if you don't learn to let it go it can feel like a heavy weight is being put on your back wherever you go. Through meditation, we can expel some of this stress and some of the negativity. Meditating allows you to calm yourself and focus. If you're having trouble remembering all the things you need to do, having trouble sleeping, facing creative blocks, or feeling out of control of your emotions, meditation can help. Another big plus... It's free and you can do it anywhere! But if you're having trouble making it a habit or getting started, try out these apps.

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3 Apps to Help You Keep a Resolution

resolution apps for self esteem

When you need a boost in motivation, turn to these applications to help you stay on track!

It’s easy to make a New Year’s resolution, but not so easy to keep a resolution. If you do it right, though, resolutions are a great way to improve an aspect of your life and build a stronger YOU! Whether it’s getting physically healthy, creating a better relationship, or trying something new, a resolution is a good tool to set goals for yourself. As well intentioned as you are when you decide on a resolution, though, it’s easy to fall into old habits by mid-March and the next thing you know your plans are out the door.

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Are you Addicted to How You Unwind?

Are You Addicted to How You Unwind: addiction, substance abuse, relationships, deal with addiction, coping mechanism, healthy coping habits

Find out if you have become addicted to your coping practices and how to address it.

Habits are a part of an individual’s life. You are defined by the rituals you follow, the activities you participate in, the things you return to in times of happiness and stress, the relationships you keep, and above all the state of mind you maintain. Having a healthy lifestyle involves maintaining a balance between oneself and the practices one engages in. Too often, this balance gets skewed toward self-destructive behavior; many even become addicted to poor habits.

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How to Deal With Fear in Your Relationship

stop being defensive

Overcoming the Obstacles that Keep You Stuck

Many arguments between couples have fear at the heart. Whether it’s fear of abandonment, fear of being rejected, or a fear of falling apart – sometimes you can lash out at the person who you want to keep the closest to you. Even though the fight might look on the surface like it’s about something else, if you look close enough you can often find that some sort of fear is hiding just under the surface. By managing your fears, you can begin to calm the storm that has begun in your relationship and heal the wounds. Here are some tips for how to conquer the fear in your relationship so you can move into a healthy direction.

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Do You Have Anxiety? How to Keep Your Relationship Strong

anxiety

Don't Let Anxiety Take Over

If you suffer from anxiety it can be hard to maintain a strong bond with your partner. When you are freaking out and he or she tries to get close, your fear might tell you to push your partner away. In reality, it’s important to learn to turn to your partner and gang up together against your anxiety, but this might not come naturally.

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Bored? How to Build Self Esteem Through Community Fun

build self esteem

How joining the circus just might change your life.

Finding a passion in your life can do worlds for your self esteem and state of mind. Whether it’s a sport, hobby, doing some sort of crafting project, or literally joining the circus – finding something you are truly invested in helps you find joy and fulfillment in your life. What’s even better is finding a group of people who also have the same passion. When you have a common interest with a group of people, a family can form, which will serve as a support system during the best and worst times in your life. Here's how to build self esteem by leveraging your hobbies and neighbors.

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One Woman’s Story: To Be or Not to Be…a Parent

One Womans Story: To Be or Not to Be a Parent

One woman's story about how she's coming to terms with infertility and her feelings about childlessness

Deciding whether or not to be a parent is not an easy choice to come by, and sometimes our decision on the subject can fluctuate -- even within the same day. Other times, we are not given the choice to have biological children, but can still choose to adopt. Below is the story of a friend of mine, who wishes to remain anonymous. She wanted to share her feelings on what it's like to be uncertain about becoming a parent, and how sometimes being childless is a choice, while other times it's an unintended circumstance.

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An Interview: How to Improve Your Skin and Self-Esteem

how to Improve Your Skin and Self-Esteem

Want to Improve Your Skin and Self-Esteem? Take a Look Inside Your Fridge.

For the second part of the well-rounded health series we will look at how what you eat affects your skin, and ultimately how you feel inside. Meet Tracy Duhs, founder of The Santuary day spa. In this interview, she filled me in on the benefits of a raw food diet, and how she sees food as being essentially linked to skin care and feeling better. She even shared her favorite recipe!

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Want to Feel Lighter? Unpack Your Emotional Baggage

Emotional Baggage: Dealing with Trauma in Relationships

Getting your emotional baggage out in the open can support a healthy relationship in the long run.

We all have emotional baggage going into a relationship. After all, you haven’t been living in a bubble until you met your partner. Our emotional baggage can get heavy when we carry it alone, so it helps to share the load with a trusted partner. On the other hand, you don’t want to disclose your entire past to someone on the very first date. So when do you start to unpack your baggage in a relationship and how do you get help with this intense task?

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The Ingredients of Emotional Health

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HOW TO GROW A STRONG EMOTIONAL FOUNDATION

Pinterest is quickly becoming a dominate social media outlet and I have been building my boards and putting them into categories. As I look for pins that exhibit health, images and quotes showing physical health and fitness abound, but pins depicting mental and emotional health are not so easy to come by. This got me thinking – especially as a therapist who focuses on relationship dynamics and emotional well-being – have we forgotten that emotional health is key to overall health? Mental health is just as important as physical health in many ways, and in fact how you feel can affect the state of your body. There are many aspects to overall health; here are some things to work on as you try to better yourself.

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Social Networking Series: The Facebook Addiction

Facebook addiction

How do I stop being so invested in social media?

You may have experienced the feeling when you sit in front of your computer working and you see a message from Facebook staring at you. You think to yourself, “I will make a quick response and then get right back on track with work and be productive.” But next thing you know, you are reading the hilarious posts from friends, responding to interesting conversations, and saying hi to friends you haven’t seen for a while. As your “quick” peak evolves into a long-long time, the facebooking feels “addicting.” Does this sound familiar? You might have a Facebook addiction.

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