Don’t waste any time pretending to be someone you’re not
Finding the right person to spend your life with is no easy task. With 7 billion people on the planet, it would be easy to wind up with someone who’s actually not so compatible. Ultimately, if you surround yourself with similar people, act with confidence, and make your interest in the other person clear, you’re off to a great start! Consider the following tips when you’re attracting your dream guy.
Avoid Being A Fake You: Some women put on a fake image of who they are in fear that they will not be liked. Women can actually hurt their chances of attracting their dream guy when they put on this false image because it doesn’t come out as the authentic YOU. Most men can really pick up on the masked identity that a woman displays and it tells them the woman isn’t secure in their own skin. Men want women who are secure, confident, and can express themselves openly. Instead, be YOU.
Give Attention: All humans love attention from others and are attracted to people who give them attention. Plain and simple. Give men attention by asking questions and show interest in them. Make sure not to go over board and appear desperate. The worst thing you can do is freeze up and wait for them to stir up conversation.
Avoid Appearing Desperate: You may be so hungry for a relationship that you are willing to go out of your way to date or available at any sign of meeting up. Men need a bit of a chase. Avoid appearing desperate. Desperation appears as if you are weak. Instead, schedule out time with your friends and stick to your plans no matter what.
Be Noticed: If you position yourself in a hidden corner at a party, you won’t ever be noticed. Make sure to be near the center of the room or in a location that has a lot of traffic. The more you are noticed, the more opportunities to finding the right guy.
Surround Yourself to What you are Attracted to: Put yourself in environments that draws out your strengths, yet it is putting you in a place where your dream man may be. For example, if your dream man is physically active, join a hiking club that will surround you with that kind of person. Not only will you enjoy the environment, but you will also be around what you are attracted to. Avoid putting yourself in environments that prevent you from shining or draws out negative characteristics in men. For example, don’t spend all your weekends at the local bar where the only common theme is alcohol. Find a place where your strengths will shine and your confidence comes out. Men are attracted to women who are secure and confident.
Confident Yet Needing Him: Real men are attracted to confident women who also need their men to do things and to help them occasionally. Don’t be overly independent where you don’t want or need your man. Men often are fixers and they want to make their partner happy. They don’t want to hear about your hang-ups about your body all the time, so avoid being complainy and weak. Avoid going haywire on your body issues or other items and show him your confident side. Men like to be needed. Show him you need him.
Physical Attraction and Body Language: Nothing gets to a man quicker than a great smell, a beautiful smile, and body language. Avoid standing with folded arms, chewing on gum, or picking at your nails. Take focusing on your physical appearance…along with how you smell. Once again, stand with confidence and show it through your body language.
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About Jennine Estes, MFT
Think of me as your relationship consultant, I'm your neutral third party that can help you untangle the emotions and help you figure out what's really going on. I am a Marriage and Family Therapist in San Diego, CA. Certified in Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples. Supervisor. I write relationship and self growth advice for my column Relationships in the Raw. Creator of #BeingLOVEDIs campaign. MFC#47653