Getting engaged is an exciting time! Why come down from Cloud 9 to discuss potential problems, right? Wrong! Now is the perfect time to discuss your needs in the relationship, including how they might be different from your partner’s needs and lead to conflict. You would check the foundation of a house before you buy it, and make repairs as needed before you move in. The same can be said of your marriage – you will have a stronger relationship if you identify and make adjustments before you sign on the dotted line.Read More
Wedding & Premarital Posts Categorized:
Issues to Consider
A lot of shows on the Bravo network only provide a guilty pleasure, but a new show caught my eye because it deals with the first year of marriage, which can be a challenging time for any couple. The series follows four couples for a year, all of whom are in very different situations. They deal with issues like money, sex, a short courtship, familial approval of the relationship, and control. I will be writing up a blog each week as the episodes unfold, and talking about the issues that come up.Read More
Steps to share your concerns about her choice
When you watch you friend in a relationship that is less than healthy, it can feel pretty helpless. If she actually declares that they're going to tie the knot, you will feel even worse. It's like standing on the curb together and watching as she starts to step into the street.Read More
It’s time to plan your wedding and tie the knot!
Planning a wedding is fun for some brides and grooms, yet for others it can be full of ups-and-downs. Some of the “downers” in wedding planning is the mis communication and difficult contacts with vendors. Since a large portion of wedding planning is communicating with vendors, I decided to reach out directly to other wedding vendors to hear what they had to say about preventing miscommunication.Read More
How to deal with wedding budget stress
Between choosing wedding vendors, dealing with pushy relatives, and spending lots of money, there are many reasons planning a wedding is stressful. In spite of the whirlwind that the months leading up to the big day can become, there are ways to get through it in one piece. One of the most crucial ways in which you can bring your blood pressure back to normal is by controlling your budget. Pinch some pennies and you will reduce your stress level, making it much easier to enjoy the wedding process!Read More
Simple steps to keep your wedding stress in check
Planning a wedding is stressful for any bride – between budgeting, making important decisions and dealing with the drama when things go wrong, the months leading up to a wedding are often a whirlwind. However, your wedding should be a happy day, so it’s important not to let the stress make you someone you’re not. If you become a crabby, selfish Bridezilla, you may end up ruining your special day or worse – some of your friendships!Read More
Wedding Advice if one or both people have kids
When you are marrying someone new and one or both of you have children, there are bound to be some aches and pains along the way. Even if everyone gets along, it can be difficult for your kids to see you enter into a new marriage and have new siblings. Ideally, you can sit down with your kids and talk about how they’re handling things before your big wedding day. In the worst case scenario, your children will have a meltdown right before you walk down the aisle.Read More
All wedding rings and engagement rings are unique, both in their appearance and significance. For some couples, the rings involved with engagement and marriage are a way to publicly show their love and commitment, and they hold deep meaning. For other couples, these rings are just an expected part of the marriage and don’t have a huge significance. Regardless of what the rings mean to the couple, in my therapy practice I have found that how a couple looks at wedding rings tends to reflect the dynamic of the relationship itself.Read More
From the time you are a young child to adolescent stages, you always envision what your life will be like. When a “grown up” asks you, “so what do you want to be when you grow up?” And that gets you thinking. Children are so eager to be like their mom and dad, or their older sister or brother. They long for the days where they can be grown up themselves and have their vision of that perfect career and family.Read More
Don't let the "over-stepping" family ruin your day.
Are pushy relatives ruining your wedding planning? Sometimes a parent, sibling, or other close family member with too many strong opinions can take what should be a fun time in your life and turn it into a nightmare! While they might mean well, if your family is telling you where to get married, dissing your dress, and demanding to sit at the head table, your whole wedding experience is in jeopardy. In order to keep your sanity intact, and retain your familial relationships, it’s important to learn how to deal with over-reaching loved ones.Read More
Get on track before you head down the isle.
If you are engaged and planning on getting married, you may have thought about premarital counseling. Premarital therapy isn’t for everyone -- some couples have a solid foundation and effective communication to create a strong bond. However, my view of premarital counseling is that it can be helpful in some way for most couples planning on saying “I do.” Just as you wouldn’t fly a plane without flying lessons, premarital counseling acts like a safety course, teaching you how to handle terbulance and all the working parts of your relationship. Premarital counseling sessions are about helping couples learn the rules of communication, explore marriage expectations, and discuss strategy plans for the unexpected future. Most premarital therapy is used as a preventative tool -- think of it as a way to get your relationship solid before walking into the married world.Read More
Are you a bridezilla? There is this huge amount of pressure to have that perfect wedding, to have exactly what we want and how we want it, and to make our vision of that day to come true. And at the same time, it can be easy to fall into the role of Bridezilla. So take a look and see if you are on your way to being a Bridezilla.Read More
Lisa Brookes Kift explains how premarital counseling helps your marriage start on the right foot
The amount of money spent on weddings is incredible, and why not? it's an unforgettable and, hopefully, life-lasting union between two people who love and are committed to each other. It's interesting then, how few people choose to invest in premarital education while planning their wedding budget. Relationships require work to remain vibrant and healthy. I suspect that the reason premarital counseling is overlooked by couples is that they are caught up in the honeymoon bliss of their romance that they don't stop to think of what obstacles may come appear down the line and how they will deal with them together. Life will throw you a curve ball at some point, premarital counseling will help you have as many tools in your marriage toolbox as possible to assist you in your relationship when this happens.Read More
Pre-marital counseling is a preventive tool.
It is used to help establish a foundation early in the relationship, offer advice on ways to maintain a healthy connection and create a lasting commitment through effective communication. Relationships are an investment; the more you put into it, the more it will grow and mature. The more it grows and matures, the more you will get out of it. Statistics show that nearly 50% of marriages end in divorce (US Census Bureau, February 2002), pre-marital counseling can help couples avoid becoming part of that statistic.