Archive for communication

Have you ever wondered why your partner keeps hearing something totally different from what you are saying? The message you are sending may be very different from your words. In his book Silent Messages, Dr. Albert Mehrabian says that the majority of communication is through body language and tone of voice, not what is said. He calls it the “7%-38%-55% Rule.” Fifty-five percent of other people’s reactions to you are based on your facial expression, 38% based on your tone of voice, and only 7%of their reaction is from the words you are actually saying. While we usually know what we are saying, often we do not know what other messages we are sending through body language. Want to find out? Read More→

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During the holidays, I was sitting with my 3 year old nephew on my lap reading him a book. After reading the story, he proceeded to get off my lap, grab another book, and sat across from me. He rapidly flipped through the pages mumbling phrases and words as if he was reading the book, and as if he were a teacher, turning the book around to show the pages. While watching him present each page, I began to think about how frequent he watches a teacher sit in front of the class, read a page, and then share the picture pages with the class. My guess is he sees his teacher read one to two times a day, 5 times a week, for the past 8 months.

If we take my nephew as an example, he just watched and absorbed the teacher’s behavior that he has watched for only 8 months. Now, take your own experiences as children. We watch our parents when they get upset, feel anger or sadness, and communicate with others. We learned from watching our parental figures daily, for many hours a day, and for 7 days a week. We absorb behaviors similar to our parent’s behaviors. We watched them express anger, communicate, cope with stress, and more. The things we saw as children influence our reactions in our current relationship. Similarly to my nephew, we replicate behaviors that we watched growing up. Read More→

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Categories : Communication
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