Archive for Personal Growth
Improve Self-Esteem: Building a more confident you
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Self-esteem and confidence is basically an overall opinion of you and can impact daily experiences. Our level of self-esteem virtually affects all areas of life; the type of people you attract, your career building, your relationships, and other important areas.
People with an unhealthy self-esteem can often send a vibe that other people can pick up on. Read More→
Advice to Stop Critical Thinking:Live Without Beating Yourself Up
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Summer’s on its way and for San Diego that means it’s a time for beaches, barbeques, and fun in the sun! Many of us find ourselves making healthy decisions like switching to water instead of drinking soda, exercising a couple more times a week, or resisting the urge to eat that second sliver of cake while others sometimes make unhealthy–potentially dangerous–choices in a rush effort to shed those lingering holiday pounds: skipping meals, crash dieting, or running on the treadmill until being on the verge of collapse. Body image is important to most everybody–a fact that is felt even more so in a city known for having beautiful people. Read More→
Stress Advice: Letting Out the Air Before You POP
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Stress and Anxiety can come in many forms and can be difficult to deal with on a daily basis. You might notice it impacting how you work, the way you parent, or even the way you communicate in your relationship.
Imagine a balloon that is not inflated. And think about when the balloon gets inflated with air, it begins to get bigger and bigger. If you don’t let out the air, it will explode. This is exactly how our emotions are! We all have an “emotional balloon” where we store our emotions. Read More→
Relationship Advice: Body Language Speaks Louder than Words
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Have you ever wondered why your partner keeps hearing something totally different from what you are saying? The message you are sending may be very different from your words. In his book Silent Messages, Dr. Albert Mehrabian says that the majority of communication is through body language and tone of voice, not what is said. He calls it the “7%-38%-55% Rule.” Fifty-five percent of other people’s reactions to you are based on your facial expression, 38% based on your tone of voice, and only 7%of their reaction is from the words you are actually saying. While we usually know what we are saying, often we do not know what other messages we are sending through body language. Want to find out? Read More→
Simple Ways to Stop Stress and Decrease Anxiety
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As a therapist in San Diego, I focus on helping my clients find more effective and useful ways to coping with Anxiety. Stress and Anxiety can come in many forms and can be difficult to deal with on a daily basis. You might notice it impacting how you work, the way you parent, or even the way you communicate in your relationship.
Imagine a balloon that is not inflated. And think about when the balloon gets inflated with air, it begins to get bigger and bigger. If you don’t let out the air, it will explode. This is exactly how our emotions are! We all have an “emotional balloon” where we store our emotions. Some people know how to release the air to prevent the balloon from overflowing and popping. And other people will continue to put their emotions into this balloon and it will occasionally pop. The popping may look like crying, anger/violence, irritability, headaches, change in sleep, reactivity, anxiety, and much more. Why not start focusing on letting out the air before popping the balloon? Read More→
Infidelity Advice: How to trust after the affair
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Rebuilding trust can be extremely difficult, especially for the deceived partner.
Rebuilding trust requires the involvement of both participants in the relationship.
Initially, the person who shattered the trust will need to work hard to build the trust back. Showing remorse, being consistent, and understanding their partner’s pain are all very important in building trust. The unfaithful participant will need to teach their partner that they can be a trustworthy and an emotionally safe person.
The partner who was deceived, on the other hand, will also need to do some work to build the trust. These simple steps will help this participant to begin rebuilding the shattered foundation of the relationship. Don’t just shove this all under the rug and pretend nothing happened. Here are a few tips on how to take steps on learning how to trust your partner again after the affair: Read More→
Advice for Affairs: Quick Tips to Build Trust after infidelity
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It may have all started with a flirt, a simple flirt. This harmless friendship crossed the line; flirtatious text messages, anticipation for the next contact, or simply a shoulder to cry on when things weren’t going right in your relationship. The friendship started off innocent, but after one too many drinks, you two ended up hooking up. This “one time mistake” or “long term affair” was hidden, pushed aside, or buried under lies because you knew you were wrong and didn’t want to lose your partner. As you attempt to keep your relationship connected with your partner, reality hit full speed ahead and your partner found out.
Rebuilding the trust and facing the consequences of your actions may feel never-ending. Hang tight, it doesn’t have to be like this forever. Keep in mind that it will be like this for now. Simply because the relationship is in a tragic storm, it doesn’t mean that it won’t make it through to sunlight again. Read More→
conflicting couples, affairs, communication struggles, etc.
