Apr

Sex Tips: How to Improve Intimacy in your Marriage

Intimacy is an all-encompassing word with sex being merely an offshoot. Intimacy is a substance that supplements the healthiest relationships by allowing partners to share their physical and emotional selves.

If you find it in yourself to be more emotionally intimate in your relationship, both you and your loved one will definitely reap the rewards in the bedroom!

Here are the top ten ways to increase and upkeep intimacy in your relationship:

Compromise when in disagreement. When you and your partner aren’t seeing things eye-to-eye take it upon yourselves to reach a happy medium you both can agree with. Ask each other, “What would make us both happy?”
Spend a MINIMUM of 30 minutes a day focusing on your partner. Spend this time with your full attention honed in on your partner. This could take place at the dinner table, in the family area/living room with the T.V. off, cuddled in bed, etc. Eliminate interruptions such as children, roommates, and friends so you can take the time to find out how their day went and share how your day was.
Plan a Date Night. Date night helps kindle intimacy. Get dressed up for one another, spend time focusing on one another, and laugh together.
Empathize and Validate your partner. Make sure that when you are in disagreement to show empathy, monitor your tone of voice, and validate your partner by letting them know you don’t think they are “crazy” for how they feel.
Show curiosity and interest in your partner. Showing interest and curiosity not only helps your partner feel important and special, but also entices them to do the same towards you! Imagine how great it feels when they intently listen to what you have to say, and do the same for your partner.
Surprise your partner with an activity that the two of you can do together. Try hiking, picnics, board/card games, etc.
Leave love messages around the house. Write things you admire about your partner on sticky notes and hide them in places you know he or she will find them.
Point out all the positive. If you acknowledge and reinforce that which you appreciate about your partner, you will find they will eagerly repeat the desired behavior instead of feeling down from belittlement.
Show your partner that you respect them. By listening, avoiding critical language, and decreasing your anger (intonation and context), you will show your partner that you have the utmost respect for their thoughts and feelings.
Stop critical language. “You should…” “You must…” “You are too…” “You never…” “You always…” — all are examples of how we point our fingers at our partners while telling them they are not right. Give them a chance and let them carry things out the way they’d like to.