Worst Relationship Advice

bad advice relationships tips love personal growth

17 Examples of the Worst Relationship Advice We've Heard

We all like to give and get advice. We read it in magazines and articles online, we hear it on tv and from friends and family. Sometimes, the advice is not good, and can actually be harmful to a relationship or an individual. We put together a list of the 17 worst pieces of relationship advice we've heard, and an explanation to why each piece is not true.

Read More

How to Handle Emotional Eating Over the Holidays

How to Handle Emotional Eating Over the Holidays

If you find yourself feeling stressed, anxious, or overwhelmed as the holidays draw near, you aren’t alone. ‘Tis the season for sugar cookies and stress!

For many people, this stress manifests itself as emotional eating, overeating, or a preoccupation with how we will make healthy choices amidst the sea of peppermint bark and spinach dip. All of these manifestations of stress take us out of the present moment and into our heads. That is not how we want you to remember your holiday season.

Read More

7 Tips for Communicating What You Want from Your Partner in the Bedroom

7 Tips for Communicating What You Want from Your Partner in the Bedroom Estes Therapy Sex Talk Jackie MFT

Communicating about sex can be vulnerable

The truth is, communicating openly about sex can be a vulnerable- and sometimes tough- thing to do. For some, knowing where to start with these conversations can feel confusing and overwhelming. Because sexuality is such an important part of our identities and our relationships, being able to practice sitting in the vulnerability and have these open conversations with your partner is crucial.

Read More

My Child Came Out To Me

what to do when your child is gay lgbt lesbian comes out transgender

Are you unsure how to react to your child coming out to you?

I have had parents ask me this a few times now, so I thought it’s time to share some quick and easy guidelines about how to handle your child’s coming out. What is most important is your relationship with your child. How you react to something that they hold fear or uncertainty around can greatly influence that relationship. You might be nervous about how to handle this for fear of pushing your child away. They have entrusted you with a part of their identity that they may hold anxiety or fear around. They are looking for you to be a safe space, to continue to accept and love them, and to not treat them any differently.

Read More

Four Divorce Predictions and Their Antidotes

John Gottman divorce prevention couples counseling san diego mft eft relationships

After over 40 years of research, Dr. John Gottman has seen four main predictors of divorce and unhappy relationships.

Divorce or separation doesn’t come without warning. You or your partner isn’t going to go to sleep completely happy with your relationship and then wake up the next morning and think “never mind” for no reason. So what should you be looking out for? Criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling.

Read More

Six Steps for Dating Your Spouse Again

dating your spouse married marriage keeping the spark datenight

How to keep focus on your relationship - even after marriage

With crammed schedules and the balancing act of work, kids, family, stress, and maybe even a little self-care time, becoming ‘autopilot partners’ can be SO easy. With the autopilot left on over time, your spouse can begin to feel like a roommate.  This can lead to falling into routines of disconnection that end up hurting you both. Being intentional about dating your spouse will not only work to keep you close and connected, it will also buffer your relationship against negativity- making those inevitable tough conversations a little bit easier. Plus, dating each other again can be a lot of fun. Sounds like a win-win-win!

Read More

How To Deal With Your Defensive Partner

defensive arguments defensiveness how to communicate fighting couples

How do you stop defensiveness from harming your relationship?

Your partner hurt your feelings or crossed a line. You want to share how you feel, but you never feel heard. Better yet, you have tried so many ways to talk about your feelings and get nowhere. They respond with explanation and frustration. They may say, “I would have gotten that done sooner, but I was busy.” Or “You are always so critical.” While we can’t control how your partner responds, we can increase the chance that they will listen by communicating in a positive and constructive way.

Read More